The Elders

By Lindsay Blake:

Monday was our free day and instead of going to the mall, as usual, Tina and I walked to the resort. The weather here is insanely hot and humid and the uphill walk produced sweat in areas I need not mention on this blog.

We stepped into the air conditioned café and before we could sit down a waiter greeted us, “Excuse me, what room number?” he asked, suspicion in every word.

Now, I know we were a bit under dressed but for the love of God we didn’t look like dirt balls either – Or maybe we did and I’m just used to it.

“We are not staying here but would like to sit down,” I said with an irritated tone.

The waiter looked at me as if to say, “I have no time for foreigners like you who will not tip well,” and reluctantly led us to our table.

I HATE ASSUMPTIONS. Granted, I’m probably making an assumption about his assumption but I’m trying to make a point here. I TIP WELL! And besides, they automatically include the tip in Panama. So unless he thought we were going to eat and run HIS CONCERNS WERE ILL PLACED.

The waiter filled our coffee cup, pointed the buffet and walked off without a word.

“I think we just bought the buffet,” I whispered to Tina.

“How much does it cost?” Tina asked.

I shrugged my shoulders, “No clue. But eat up.”

Alone at the table my mind began to worry. CRAP! I hope this isn’t “over the top” in price. I tried to figure out what my “over the top” price would be.

They look like they speak English, I thought spotting a couple across the room.

I walked toward them, smiled and sat down.

“Hello,” I began. “Do you speak English?”

“Yes,” replied the man with the black Pirates t-shirt.

“Do you happen to know how much this breakfast buffet costs?” I asked trying my best to hid the concern in my voice.

“No, it comes with our room,” they responded. “But the dinner buffet is $25.”

$25… $25?! ARE YOU TWO OUT OF YOUR MIND?!

“Thank you,” I said getting up quickly, before they could see the steam coming out of my ears.

WHAT THE HELL? THE BUFFET LOOKED DECENT BUT NOT $25 WORTH. Not even $20 worth for that matter. Maybe $10, I would definitely be OK with $10.

Running like a 100m sprinter I shouted to the waitress at the counter, “Excuse me, how much does the breakfast buffet cost?”

“$16.”

My shoulders dropped. Tina made her way back with a plate full of food.

“I found out the cost,” I said in a tone less than enthusiastic.

After biting into her food Tina asked, “Oh yeah, and?”

“$16.”

“$16?”

“Yep. We need to eat $16 worth of this buffet,” I said with a slight smile. “I mean I think I could do that.”

“I just ate a pita before we walked here,” Tina laughed. “I’m already full.”

“$16 unquestionably makes the two of us guests for the day,” I said. “A swim in the pool is undoubtedly included.”

Our breakfast buffet we fell into and could not get out of.

The pool at the bottom was the one we enjoyed for 2 plus hours.

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